Eating and drinking beer, that's where.
We have this annual biometric screening at work that is mandatorally voluntary. It's like a regular test: 100 is like Jillian Michaels (without the male genitalia) and 0 is equivalent to an un-reanimated corpse from the Walking Dead. If you score above a 70 (a C minus), you get like $50 or something.
Historically, I have been regressing and regressing on this pop quiz that we know occurs every October. Additionally, none of my old cute clothes fit me so well. I've had to buy some Dad-pants that do that weird creasing thing in the crotch.
I've also generated some back fat that pushes my jeans below my buttcrack when I do work around the house. I don't mind showing Kitty the continental divide, but I am not a fan of cold air near my undercarriage.
So...
Kitty convinced me to do a 30 day 'No Booze Eat OK' Challenge. NBEOK would be the acronym, but who can remember that. It has been renamed the BONE-K challenge, because I am in charge.
January 2nd was the first day. I do believe it was the first day I've had without booze in 2015. Pretty proud of myself.
DAY 1
My day consisted of food that didn't taste good or fill me up, 3 Diet Cokes, and a late night snack of steamed brocolli with Frank's Red Hot. You can make anything better with Frank's, and they know it.
I am still hungry. I now fill myself up on big breaths of air. I look in the liquor cabinet and imagine myself swimming in a bottle of Woodford Reserve.
Happy Saturday
